A collection of Dilbert trivia facts from the comic strips and books by Scott Adams.
Where possible I have included [in brackets] the date of the comic strip. List of Dilbert Books.
PHB rated her "Tyrannosaurus Rex" in the new performance review rating system. [2/25/95]
Dresses like a man to protest the company's dress code. [2/2+/95]
Has worked for The Boss for ten years as of [8/25/92]
Had a baby by the Xerox Machine, named it "Butthead" after The Boss. [8/5/91]
Brought her new baby to the office, Someone called it "Bug-Ugly". [5/20/89]
Allen - Amorphous Cloud Of Gas, who exists as a subtle odor near the copier room. [8/10/08]
Allen - When the PHB cut the salary budget he became an end table. Hopes to get promoted to a credenza someday. [2/23/99]
Allen - PHB's new sycophant. [5/20+/98]
Allen - Telecommuting employee, was fired four years ago. [8/9+/02]
Allen - Stares at you like a zombie for long periods before responding to questions. (One of Dogbert's examples of people who have personality defects.) [12/12/93]
Amber Dextrous - The perfect employee, she can do two things at the same time. [7/2/06]
Andy - Was appointed Director Of Green because he screwed up being director of something else. [9/24/08]
Andy - Tall senior management member of the Technology Steering Committee. [3/22/06]
Ann - Dilbert bet Ted that she could ignite a match by swearing at it. [11/5/98]
Anne - Gave up sleep, exercise and nutrition for intravenous coffee. [10/4/94]
Anne L. Retentive - Proofreader, catch phrase "My world is falling apart."
Dilbert put her in a "comma" with a typo in his first draft [3/29/00]
PHB taunts her with "I'm going to task you with a deliverable." [10/12/01]
Asok - Summer intern [3/18+/96]
Died during a test of the Moon Shuttle Prototype. PHB saved his DNA in a jar. [12/7+/2007]
His job got outsourced back to India. [5/30/06]
Graduated from the Indian Institute of Technology. [10/30/05]
PHB can't give him a raise because he's too young. [2/28/99]
Makes sarcastic remarks to the PHB via speakerphone. [12/8/96]
Alice threatens to launch Asok with the "Internapult". [8/23/96]
Tells the PHB about people using entire colons where semicolons would do just fine. [8/20/96]
Antimatter Dilbert - Brought from an antimatter world by Dilbert using a particle accelerator. [6/30+/08]
Antina - A non-stereotypical woman created by request. [1/1+/96]
Aunt Helen - Dilbert's Aunt [10/11/90]
Gave Dilbert a knitted elbow warmer, which Dilbert then gave to Dogbert. [10/11/90]
Avery Wong - A typo in the marketing forecast replaced his name with 'Everyone'. [2/9/04]
Bad Ed - A criminal elected leader of Dilbert's neighborhood crime watch group. [7/3+/89]
Barry - Employee that got a special bonus check for working hundreds of hours of overtime. [3/31/96]
Becky/Bob - Coworkers that had a new baby and suffer lack of sleep. [7/31/02]
Ben - Very tall, fast-track manager, with executive style hair. [8/27/92]
Betty - Speaker at the Insane Chicks meeting, Topic: 'All the people who are intentionally hurting us.' [7/5/06]
Betty - Ordinary looking woman in marketing, Dilbert, Wally and Ted daydream about her. [5/25+/93]
Betty the Bulldozer - Always gets what she wants. Tells Asok to Drop everything and start doing her bidding. [6/24/06]
Beverly - Generic job title given to everybody when flattening the organization. [1/5/94]
Big Boss - (Boss of The Boss) He was a geometry or geography major. [9/17+/91]
Big Ed - Large employee who bumps into Wally and Dilbert, refers to them as debris. [5/6/92]
Bill - Never follows through according to Alice. [9/10/06]
Bill - Dilbert must absorb Bill's project when he transfers. [6/20/04]
Bob - The unluckiest insurance agent. [12/20/06]
Bob - Is a moron according to Alice. [9/10/06]
Bob - A tennis shoe wearing dinosaur. (First appearance 7/18/89)
Dilbert calls him to deliver a wedgie to a speakerphone using co-worker. [9/22/96]
"King of the Wedgies"
Tells Dilbert that he's a vegetarian. [4/2/94]
Used a "Twirling Wedgie" on The Boss [6/7/93]
Dawn calls him "Robert". [7/21/89]
Bob's mate is Dawn, their son is named Rex. [7/19+/89]
Bob jokes about being a "Thesaurus" [7/20/89]
Bob - Wally was supposed to help Bob get the technical specifications together. [7/16/06]
Bob - Vice President of Marketing, leaving after 17 years. [3/3/06]
Bob - "Reverse Makeover Consultant" Straight eye for the queer-looking guy. [11/7/04]
Bob - "Single-Task Bob" can't help Alice and read his email at the same time. [6/1/03]
Bob - Dilbert asks secretary if Bob is in his office twenty feet away. [6/6/94]
Bob (a.k.a. "Strangler")
Prison inmate sent to live with Dilbert, after Dilbert wrote a letter complaining about prison over-crowding. Bob's prison uniform number is: 5496732. [7/2/89]
Bobby - Potential Stay-At-Home Husband for Alice. [6/10+/03]
Bobby McNewton - Child-star from the sixties, had a speaking part on "Leave it to Beaver", wrote a book titled: "Bobby McNewton's Cooking with Walnuts". [11/10/91]
Bobby Noober - Principal at Dilbert's High School. [10/24/91]
Bob Flabeau - Received the Lifetime Gullibility Award from Dogbert. [2/26/00]
Bob Weaselton - Full-Service Stockbroker visited by Dilbert. [9/22/02]
Boron - Comic character created by Dogbert that looks like Dilbert. [7/3/94]
The Boss - a.k.a. Pointy-Haired Boss. (First appearance, low hair, 7/31/89)
Wanted Dilbert to interview his nephew for a job. [2/11/01]
Started using voice-mail to provide a "Quality Thought of the Day". The first one, according to Webster's Dictionary is "Aardvark". [8/11/96]
Handed out T-Shirts that came in sizes "Small", "Petite", or "Elfin" [4/28/96]
Majored in Art History [4/14/96]
Thought the company should license Barney as their mascot. [5/7/95]
Title: "Director Of Product Enhancements" (DOPE) [7/14/95]
Sold "Cub Girl Cookies" for a nameless daughter. 0-4 boxes was the "Downsizer" volume, 5-8 boxes was "Low Performer", Dilbert signed Wally up for the 600 box "Fast Tracker" volume. Wally said he only ordered 12 boxes for "United Way Chairperson" level. [7/7/96]
Wearing his "Porto-Shredder" around the office. [4/29/92]
Hired famous business consultant "Tom Peters" to follow Dilbert around. [10/25/91]
Bottleneck Bill - Dilbert calls him a Bottleneck while waiting for his input. [11/5/03]
Bill's philosophy is that anything worth doing is worth delaying. [11/3+/04]
Brad - Dilbert says Brad's comments are cruel, Brad says it's male bonding. [9/29/91]
Brad has a child named Becky.
Bradley - Cousin, of an Elbonian trying to buy a potato, lives in Phlimsk. [9/15/08]
Bradley - Manager of Executive Compensation. Recommends buying the PHB a pony. [11/30/03]
Bradley - Accounting troll assigned to train Dilbert. [8/17/90]
Brenda - Female co-worker, brainwashed by the new company slogan: "Quality". [6/10/92]
Brenda Utthead - Female co-worker, whined about her email address being first initial plus last name. [8/19/00]
Brent - Went to engineering, when Dilbert was on "rotational assignment" to marketing. [4/11/92]
Brian - Consultant fired by the PHB to save money. Was told to transfer his knowledge to Flossie. [6/3/01]
Bruce - PHB said the Bruce was totally incompetent at his job and moved him to another job. [12/25/07]
Bruce - PHB didn't have a cubicle for him, he got a section of carpet for his office. PHB gave him an electric shock dog collar to wear. [12/14/97]
Bruce - Got laid off. [11/20/91]
Bucky - The Project Manager, who gives Dilbert a painful and difficult project. [4/29/00]
Bud - Grouchy co-worker, to whom Dilbert introduced the new guy. [5/19/91]
Buff Bufferman - New coworker who tells Dilbert he goes rock climbing during blizzards for fun. [2/8/04]
Camping Carl - Suspender wearing co-worker who visits Dilbert's cube. Dilbert leaves through an escape tunnel. [1/12/96] [5/11/97]
Carl - Ted will train Dilbert to take over Carl's function because Ted was sometimes in the general vicinity when Carl did the function. [2/8/09]
Carl - Was told by Lead Developer Dilbert to keep up the bad work. [5/4/08]
Carl - Was fired because he was totally incompetent at everything he did. Had to train Dilbert to do his job before he left. [9/6/07]
Carl - Quit the company and was the only one who knew how to program the legacy system. [12/8/06]
Carl - a.k.a. KRUPHNEHDAHPHEWEUNDIKANISWALYNIAPHORGANOPOP from the Elbonian Call Center. [5/6/04]
Carl - Worked in the call center while studying for the priesthood. [2/18/01]
Carl - Turned into a jargon-spewing corporate zombie by Dogbert. [6/16/93]
Assigned a project similar to Dilbert. [10/25/95]
Carl - Temp. employee 'wasted' by Dilbert with his laser pointer pen. [9/22/93]
Carl - An Outside Contractor.
Was told by Catbert that he was not allowed to breathe company air. [10/10/01]
PHB asked him to Hover and not use company gravity. [10/11/01]
Carlos - The Diamond Smuggler.
Dogbert tried to sell his car when he got a job as a Used Car Salesman. [8/12/91]
Carol - Administrative assistant to the Boss. [2/2/92][10/2/95]
PHB wants her to feel emotionally invested in the vision and mission of the company. Her only emotion is anger. [11/26/09]
PHB wanted to talk to Carol about her career goals. [10/8/09]
Made Director of First Impressions Pro Tem by the Pointy-Haired Boss. [1/3/05]
Brought her kids (Tess the yeller, and Smokey the Biter) to work because the day care was closed. [11/30/99]
Scheduled a celebration for the engineers who got patents for the tenth in the PHB's calendar. [2/2/97]
Told by The Boss to type out all his incoming voice mail, print out all his e-mail, and get him a sandwich from the cafeteria. She takes advantage of the reclusive boss to tell the engineers that the new dress code is "Bumblebee Costumes". [8/4/96]
Booked the PHB's flight to New York via third-world countries. [10/24/95]
Was supposed to put the "United Way" update between the two adgenda items. [10/2/95]
Makes suggestions on Dilbert's report. [2/2/92]
Mister Catbert - "Evil Director of Human Resources." (Hired by Dogbert) [3/20/95]
Introduces the new patented "Head Cubicle" plan. [9/15/96]
Cheryl - The only one who knows the ordering system, and is on her honeymoon for two weeks. [8/24/02]
Cheryl - Dobert asks her out to lunch next week, but she already ate. [3/21/94]
Chuck - Reorg requesting manager. [10/30/95]
Chuck - Dilbert's old high school nemesis. [10/10/93]
Cliffy - Sales person wearing electroshock pants while trying to sell the Wireless Hassock product. [2/11/04]
Co-op Employee - Lasted one day, "didn't fit in". [2/14/96]
Co-op Employee - PHB puts him in charge of the "PTG Project" (Paper Towel Guy). [7/2/95]
Connie - Member of the Secret Society of Executive Secretaries. [5/18/04]
Cyrus the Virus - New Senior Vice President replaces employees with his old cronies. [5/20/02]
Disgruntled Doug - Assigned to work on the company pricing model. Has a laser printer box for a cubicle. [5/13/07]
Doctor Wolfington - Was fired for giving the PHB the creeps, "People with excessive nose hair and anyone who insists on being called Doctor." [7/14/01]
Jack - Dilbert's date slips into an "old Boyfriend Coma" and mentions Jack. [12/26/93]
Janet - Large-nosed co-worker nicknamed "Toucan Sam", she snorted Norman up her nose. [2/16/92]
Jeff - The Human Ashtray. Announced as Dilbert's new boss. [3/26+/07]
Jennifer - Interview candidate for Engineering. [3/3/96]
Jenny Dworkin - Dilbert plotted her normal speed, habits and tendencies into his computer in order to predict her location, in order to bump into her as if by chance. [10/13/89]
Jesus- Pronounced Hay-soos, Wally's new team leader. [3/8+/08]
Jim - The Security Guard. Talking with him is as exhausting as going to the gym. [12/23/02]
Jimmy - Explains the new Marketing Stategy to appeal to sick people. [3/23/03]
Jittery Jeff - PHB brings him to Catbert for counseling. [5/20/01]
John Smith - New co-worker.
Featured on "America's Most Wanted" for giving Wedgies to an entire town, one person at a time. [9/15/91]
Johnson - Co-worker.
Slayed by The Boss with a dart when determining staff cuts. [11/19/91]
Johnson's drug blood test results are: "Lives on Cheetos and Diet Pepsi, His wife doesn't love him, he likes to dress in grass skirts and make fun of the lawnmower." [6/10+/91]
Asks a meaningless, rambling question after the staff meeting was over. [10/24/90]
Jose - In accounting was supposed to get Dilbert's liver when the PBH used him for spare parts. [3/17/94]
Juan Delegator - Gets others to do his work in the name of Teamwork. [7/28+/99]
Judy - Gets Attendance Award for Missing the Most Days. [11/8/99]
Larry - Wally was going to get the beta test results from him after reading about Larry 'In Memoriam' in the company Newsletter. [5/31/08]
Larry - A dinosaur. (First appearance 7/24/89)
Dinosaur that survived being hit by a meteor, and then became a first of a new breed called "Doctor-Billed Flattypuss". [7/24+/89]
Larry - An Accounting Troll that spits all over Dilbert and his paperwork. [10/24/01]
Laura - From engineering, Dilbert, Wally and Ted daydream about her. [5/25+/93]
Lauren - Dilbert's cousin who has a degree in English. [12/17/04]
Laurie - New engineer that Dilbert was to show the ropes to. [8/7/94]
Lefty - Security person summonded by the PHB while interviewing Earl. [12/04/05]
Les - Pronounced "Lez", Short co-worker, Attempted to date Helen. [8/30/91]
Lisa - Woman that caused all of the problems with the company's projects this year. [2/15/04]
Lisa - Female co-worker.
Dilbert asked her out to dinner on Saturday night, she had to wash her hair. [3/23/94]
Dilbert said bad things about her in order to get promoted. [7/3/93]
Dilbert dated her, she broke the dating off with a rejection brick. [9/1/91]
Liz - Dilbert's sometime girlfriend, an engineer for a different company, she is an expert on composite materials.
Tells Dogbert he's cuter than cats. Pets him with fingernails. [11/25/94]
Tells Dilbert she finds him oddly appealing. [8/8/94]
She and Dilbert see their first 'shooting star' together. [7/25/94]
Third date with Dilbert, though 1st date only counted as 85% of a date. [7/2/94]
Has dinner and a walk with Dilbert. [6/24+/94]
Dilbert noticed she wasn't wearing a ring and asked her to go for a pizza after the soccer game. [6/18/94]
Lola - Lady Dilbert didn't want to share his cubicle with, it was okay once he saw her. [5/2/05]
Loopy - The woman who couldn't end a story. [4/17/05]
Lou - See Mister Serdecisions. [5/29/06]
Loud Howard - Wally threatened Dilbert that he would make Howard his cubicle neighbor unless Dilbert gave Wally his immortal soul, Wally settled for Dilbert's laser printer instead. [4/21/95]
Alice and Dilbert complaint that Loud Howard uses his speakerphone in his cubicle. [4/14/08]
Returns by popular demand and then announces the new REORG! [10/11+/06]
Lulu - Lady Alice needed input from for her stalled project. [7/8/00]
Lyin' John - Neglected to include the netowrk and server in his sale. [9/11/06]
Mahoney - Employee tossed out the window by those who misinterpreted C.E.O. Dilbert's gesture. [11/7/91]
Mary - Told Wally his role would be transitioned. Wally mistakes the PHB for Mary in the hallway. [2/15/09]
Mary - Dated Dilbert after he had made 10 million in the stock market. [7/16/92]
Watched "Gone With The Wind" in the ladies room with Alice. [7/31/92]
Matt the Temp - PHB needed him to wade out in the flooded parking lot to find downed power cables. [4/12/08]
Matt - On his first day Wally introduces himself with a 'blank' business card. [8/31/03]
Matt - Looks for the FAX machine, Wally sends him to the shredder instead. [8/15/94]
Matt - Speaks slowly about amazingly boring topics. His head can be outfitted with a reading stand. (One of Dogbert's examples of people who have personality defects.) [12/12/93]
Matt - Fresh out of engineering school. Dilbert is to be his mentor. [11/30+/93]
Medical Mel
New cubicle neighbor that will be making loud personal phone calls all day. [3/13/02]
His new nickname at the hospital is Bob - short for Shishkabob. [3/14/02]
Mel - Man attending Irv Klepfurd's retirement celebration. [7/19/90]
Michael T. Suit - His friends call him M.T. He enhances core competencies by leveraging platforms. And compensates for a lack of substance by using buzzwords and attending meetings. [1/25+/02]
Mike - The Vegan. Couldn't eat at any of the fifty choices for lunch. [9/3+/03]
Millard Bullrush - Politician who went snorkeling and got killed by a sea turtle. [12/19/94]
Dilbert's company is competing for the Millard Bullrush Quality Award. [12/19+/94]
Milt - Had to give up exercising and eating healthy food to get things done. [5/27/05]
Mindy - Wanted Dilbert to work all night to make a change to some software or she'd spread a rumor about him. [10/14+/06]
Ming - Web Mistress. [12/11/99]
PHB moved the Web Mistress function to IS reporting to Mordac. [6/6/00]
Miss Cerberus - The Boss's Secretary who challenged Dilbert to bring her the head of Willy the Mail Boy. [4/29+/91]
Miss Mulput - a.k.a. Miss "MolePit", Dilbert's 4th grade teacher, she made him write "I will not be homely in class" 1,000 times on the chalk board for chewing gum. [7/19/92]
Miss Pennington - See 'Harold'.
Mr. Death
Shows up at Dilbert's house looking for Gilbert. Dilbert finally makes him leave by telling him about his recent trip to the "Fresno Raisin Festival". [6/26+/89]
Mister Goodenrich - President of Dilbert's company. [7/25/93]
Mister Serdecisions - (a.k.a. Lou) Needed Dilbert to cover for him so he could put shelf paper in his kitchen cabinets. [5/29/06]
Nancy - Hired because of personal problems, including being in love with a medical school cadaver. [6/25+/07]
Nardo - Co-worker from the "Old Country". [12/20/91]
Neal Snow - Dilbert's new boss. [7/31/89]
When introduced to Dilbert as Mr. Snow, he extends his hand and says "Neal Please", so Dilbert kneels before him. When recounting the story to Dogbert later Dogbert says good thing he was not named "EatAChair". [7/31+/89]
Ned - Visited Dogbert's Password Recovery Service for Morons saying "I done forgot my password." [1/18/07]
Ned - Alice had to train him to do everything that she did. [2/7/04]
Nelson - Tina's new gay supervisor, who she gets to train. [1/19+/05]
Nervous Ed - Assigned to a special project by the PHB. [9/12/93]
Norma - A Mom that plays Scrabble with Dilbert's mom. Her son finished three projects last year to Dilbert's one project. [9/26+/02]
Norman - Janet accidentially snorted him up her nose. [2/16/92]
Ron - Reporter asking Dogbert the Stock Market Expert a question. [10/17/01]
Ron - Dilbert's new Team Member, his name is Ron but everyone calls him Mo. [1/5/03]
Ruebert - Robot abandoned by Dilbert, brought to life by the garbage man, named by Dogbert, who then created a feminine robot that called him "Gomer". [2/10+/92]
Rufus T. Skwerrel - New CEO, his first job was Trailer Park Burglar. [9/9+/02]
Russell - Introduced as the WDG (Worthless Dumb Guy) for the project." [1/17/10]
Russell - Encounters "Secretary with a Crossbow." [11/22+/93]
Sally - Has worked for The Boss for eight years. [8/25/92]
Sam Grooper - Ruthless Criminal whose wallet Dilbert and Dogbert found. [11/24/91]
Sandeep - Made photocopies for the PHB after Asok's job got outsourced back to India. [5/30/06]
Scott - Was collecting money for his own birthday present, paper towels and cereal. [6/8/09]
Sharon
Dilbert had a 'date' with her to grout her bathtub, in the past he has cleaned her rain gutters, painted her house, installed a sprinkler system and rebuilt her car's engine. [6/4/89]
Shelly - Her birthday is August 30th, Alice asked Dilbert for his randon stack of birthday cards. [8/30/08]
Silent Gary - Invited to meeting to help decide on a technology direction. Dilbert asks hi if he's actually a moron. [12/27/09]
Smokin' Jim - Coworker with a Nicotine Addiction, A Tiny Bladder, and Attention Deficit Disorder. [6/20/06]
Would be highly productive for an hour in the containment suit. [6/19/06]
Son-Of-A-Boss - Son of the Pointy-Haired Boss. - (Introduced 7/13/98)
Introduced to Dilbert, hid in attic for four years instead of going to college [7/13/98]
Dad (PHB) taught him everything he knows [7/14/98]
Talked to Alice about product design [7/15/98]
Promoted to Vice President of Marketing (due to his complete lack of knowledge) [7/16/98]
Sophie - One of the best engineers in the business. Was hired by Dilbert's company along with her incompetent husband. [12/12/99]
Sourpuss - Every office has one so the PHB hired one for Dilbert's office. [12/7+/05]
Stan - From Marketing, Dilbert joked that he could alter Stan's DNA though the LAN. Stan started turning into a Weasel. [7/3+/95]
Steve - Decorated Army Combat Veteran hired by the PHB. [9/5+/06]
Stinky Pete - Helps Alice out with a technical problem. [7/1+/06]
Sue Boysenberry - Is Erin's boss. [9/21/08]
Susan - Budget Analyst.
Told her budget was useless and was fired by the PHB. [3/19/94]
PHB asks her to make the budget cuts throughout his dept. [3/8/94]
Sven - Hired to design a product interface. Last job was as an international terrorist. Dilbert says "I hear you went to Yale." Sven replied, "I yust got out last week." [12/26+/94]
Technology Buddha - PHB tells Dilbert to take a document to him for enlightenment. When Dilbert gets to his office he is busy meditating about a huge bowl of Vanilla Ice Cream. [4/12/00]
Ted - Homeland Security ordered the PHB to beat him to death with the Emergency Preparedness Binder. [11/28/09]
Ted - Alice complains that Ted is a drama queen and working with him would just slow her down. [10/16+/09]
Ted - Gets new responsibility to keep the pigeons from defiling the ledges." [9/10/09]
Ted - Wally accuses him of stealing because the PHB can't find things on days Ted is in the building." [8/16/09]
Ted - PHB let him go offering constructive feedback "You're like a blister on a skunk's colon." [6/10/09]
Ted - The wrong size for the company after 14 years of loyal service in a fabric-covered box. [3/29/09]
Ted - Wally made a compelling case for bringing back free coffee and firing Ted. [3/22/09]
Ted - Ted will train Dilbert to take over Carl's function because Ted was sometimes in the general vicinity when Carl did the function. [2/8/09]
Ted - Is the only one who knows about the timeline for deployment. And he's on vacation. [11/23/08]
Ted - Was told he could keep his job but it is being moved 50 miles away. How about 100? [10/30/08]
Ted - PHB asked him to do one more thing and his head exploded. [9/18/08]
Ted - Got promoted, has high cholesterol, Dilbert chipped in a dollar for a cake. [9/8/08]
Ted - Became and either-or situation with paper, and was Gossipsized by Catbert. [6/15+/08]
Ted - Eaten (Foop) by Admiral B'tang-B'tang from the one company in the galaxy willing to form a strategic alliance. [4/25/08]
Ted - Was let go because the PHB made a typo in his budget request. [8/31/07]
Ted - Eliminated his function and outsourced it to Dogbert Outsourcing Co. Ted was hired by Dogbert to do that job. [7/10/07]
Ted - So busy that his head exploded when the PHB gave him one more thing to do. [5/25/07]
Ted - Needs to work late every night and every weekend until they catch up. [5/19/07]
Ted - Died two weeks ago but his get well card was still being passed around. [3/5/07]
Ted - Was on vacation so Wally blamed him for things and took his office supplies. [3/4/07]
Ted - Given a T-shirt for his work on the Alpha Project "IDIOT" and fired. [10/6/06]
Ted - Asok told the PHB that Ted's project was floundering. [9/22+/06]
Ted - Is a liar according to Alice. [9/10/06]
Ted - PHB sent him on a team building exercise in the middle of the desert. [4/4/06]
Ted - Has his sandwich taken from the break room fridge by the PHB. [11/23/05]
Ted - Fired for saying negative things about the company in his blog. [10/04/05]
Ted - Suggests putting motion sensors on the lights in the break room. [10/16/04]
Ted - PHB hires an aggressive replacement to share his resources and make Ted quit. [2/21/04]
Ted - PHB tells him "You're going to experience an involuntary separation from payroll." [1/8/04]
Ted - Dibert emails the PHB about Ted being rude and unhelpful, PHB forwards it to Ted. [11/10/03]
Ted - Got downsized to pay for Management Retreat in Hawaii. [10/9/03]
Ted - Resigned, and Asok was assigned to find out where Ted hid his files. [3/1/00]
Has thirty days to find a new job within the company. [10/31+/00]
Carol scheduled his ten year service party for Tuesday, when he was having surgery. [8/12/00]
Got a promotion to "Vice Duke and Imperial Majesty of all Engineering", but still could not have business cards. [8/2/00]
Turned his hugh resignation manifesto into an Off-Broadway theatre production. [4/2/00]
Ted - Boyish looking co-worker. [4/13/98]
Had 10 seconds to decide if he wanted to be "Restructured, Repurposed or Reassigned." [03/25/02]
His mobster brother was killed, co-workers held a surprise party with Karaoke. [1/7+/98]
Grew a "beard" to get promoTed to manager. [1/3+/96]
Has a baby shower, and gets office supplies from Dilbert, Alice and Wally. [7/19+/95]
Got a "Singular Achievement" award, a $1,000 check, for creating hte "We are Teams" campaign. [2/28/95]
Is still working away as Dilbert, Alice and Wally are flicking their fingers. [11/24/94]
Tells Dilbert he's working like a dog and starts scratching. [2/16/93]
Tries to sell "Camp Girl Cookies" to Dilbert on behalf of his daughter. [8/23/92]
Uses body language to discourage people from trying to make him work. [6/19/92]
Wally asks Ted if he's nervous about the big layoffs coming. [12/5/91]
Takes his vacations in ten minute increments during regular work days to avoid assignments. [10/31/91]
Ted Griffin - In Finance, Dilbert needed his signature on his business case for a Web server. [5/15/95]
Tex - Insulted Asok (thought he was a taxi driver) who made his head explode. [10/30/05]
Tim - Co-worker.
Left the company to "Pursue Other Opportunities" [1/7/94]
Worked for five days without sleep to finish a report, on the 4th day he was visited by an Incan Monkey God who told him what to write. He was promoted to Division Manager, and got an office with a door. [8/3+/92]
Tim - Was told about his promotion by the PHB, but the promotion was for Tom. [5/25/03]
Tim - Got a rejection letter from Dogbert the Publisher. [6/30/94]
Tim Zumph - Writer of the Famous memo of February Third, 1978. [3/1/93]
Timmy - Tried to buy an used car from Dogbert with his lawn mowing earnings. [8/14/91]
Tina - Technical Writer in Dilbert's Company. [8/28/95]
PHB gave his word he would lower the industry average pay to match her pay. [10/7/09]
PHB told her she could not work at home anymore because the admins couldn't. [9/22/09]
PHB decided to base her salary on the number of pages she writes. High volume, low quality. [11/27+/07]
Rewrote the entire project scope instead of just documenting the project status. [11/16/06]
Employee of the Month, for all the various work she does. [12/29/05]
Had to write the Annual Report, used 'Enron Beelzebub' font. [10/10+/05]
Got a new gay supervisor, that she had to train to be her boss. [1/19+/05]
Got a "POOR" performance rating becaue the PHB couldn't open attachments. [3/25/01]
Told Alice that she plans to marry a rich guy. [2/26/99]
Wrote a draft of a manual with a chapter titled "Duh". [9/20/96]
"The red-faced monkey of love" She wrote a steamy love e-mail to her new boyfriend Tom, and used the "Send-To-All" address. [8/5+/96]
Assigned to the Department Newsletter project with Asok and Ratbert. [3/26+/96]
Was asked to have the documentation written for a product that didn't exist yet. [8/28+/95]
Tina - Manager of the Sales department. [12/15/92]
Toby - Guy that was interviewed by Catbert who called him "Tubby". [1/3/99]
Todd - Laughs nervously at every one of his own comments. He must be relocated to a distant planet. (One of Dogbert's examples of people who have personality defects.) [12/12/93]
Tom - Given two weeks' notice by the PHB, Dilbert has to do his job until replaced. [1/31/06]
Tom Jackson - Had a meeting with the PHB but was written down as Gom Axfon. [4/26/09]
Too Helpful Guy - Offered to send Dilbert two truckloads of Parmesan cheese, gave him tickets for the "World-O-Cheese" exhibit in Wisconsin. [5/6/01]
Topper - "No matter what you say about yourself, he'll top it." [1/1+/01]
Paid a homeless Elbonian family a million dollars to take his house. [11/9/09]
His thighs are so strong he is afraid to jump rope when the sun is directly overhead. [5/27/09]
Once passed a gallstone so big that it became Secretary of Labor in the Clinton administration. [5/8/09]
Had spider glands transplanted into his body so he can make his own silk garments. [5/7/09]
Discovered that his house is insulated with (grated) cheese. [5/6/09]
During the Crimean war, all he had to eat was the cold stench of death. He uses moisturizer. [1/3/09]
Donated all his organs to sick people and uses his hollow torso like a backpack with a family of squirrels. [12/23/08]
Died after not sleeping for a month, came back as a zombie but cured himself, took pictures of heaven. [6/1/08]
Claims to have strangled 900 insurgents with his bare hands. [11/13/06]
Carried over so much time they created a new month and named it Topperuary [4/22/06]
Topper broke his leg and hopped 40 miles to work. [12/12/05]
Topper vs. The Boss [8/19/05]
Topper versus Alice [8/18/05]
Topper vs. a Customer [8/17/05]
Topper versus The Feature Creep [8/16/05]
Toxic Tom - He complained about his last job all through his interview. [2/27/03]
Traylor - Carol's "infected" son who couldn't go to school, shook hands with the PHB. [4/2/04]
Traylor - Carol's daughter brought to the office the day Carol had to wear the dog costume. [3/26/06]
Trixie - Catbert's Lab Assistant who attached sensors to Dilbert's head to track his thoughts. [6/21/08]
Uncle Albert - Dilbert's uncle the famous Biologist.
Won many awards for his work in breeding sea anemones [8/5+/96]
Uncle Max - Dilbert's uncle the Policeman.
Dilbert uses regular paper, and not legal size to write him a letter. [10/18/89]
Uncle Ned (Dilbert's uncle the Hunter)
Dog was named Rusty, his neighbors were Florence, Dave and Muffin the cat, he maintains the "Hall-o'-Postal Employees". [1/19/92]
Upholsterygeist
Dilbert's chair and footstool become possessed by mischievous spirits, Dilbert drives them out by playing his "Jane Fonda Workout Tape" ("The Exercist!"). [5/24+/89]